In the evening, the wild wideness of light's colors casts forth a last decree of the sun's beauty. Dark silhouettes of leafless trees leave hearts hungry for something they had missed when the trees stood in lights fullness. The dying light calls forth the worshipping side of man, and we wake up to the light and call after its going, aching for it to stay. We remember its true beauty just as we remember the true beauty of the elder who we love when we see them withered and dying, their life's past glory burning in our hearts in a way we had never known.
I stood in his light ungratefully. I saw him and knew him, saw him and did not esteem him. I did not praise nor beg nor ask nor listen, I went on with life as life was to be on with. But now I see him pass, and my heart cries out to him and praises the beauty I had forgotten. His last light casts itself on those around me leaving only the shapes of things previously known in full. These I knew, these true and beautiful ones I knew but never loved. All the shades of his light were known before, but undiluted I had never honored nor recalled them. The dying, suffering light sets, and my heart breaks and waits. Then I remember:
He has bound himself to his cross. And by his cross he binds himself to us like the sun has tethered itself to the earth. He will arise, and I will see his face and know his grace once more.
May Your dying and reviving always be in our hearts. May Your dawning and evening meet us new every day renewing our remembrance of who You are and what You have done.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Sunday, February 19, 2012
An Honest Poem
The Lion and a Lamb
The rain fell for a fourth day
deluding the rhythm of cars and lights.
Driving from the church
my Camry rolled to a halt.
A Lexus was stopped alone against the curve.
"Just like mine only dressed in luxurious turns."
In it, Idling in the opposite flow,
A lonely lady hid in sheets of acidic rain.
She sat bent low
holding the steering wheel with withered arms.
Her hair shorn like a lamb before slaughter
and her head wrapped in blood red silk.
Her weeping cries bayed into the sobbing windows and
drowning rain.
My lion's heart felt her dread.
A lifeless life bearing
tumors in her womb
carrying her towards those four mourners
in a green field with grey stones.
But in the cage of plastic and glass
the lion held.
His burning brown eyes looking through mine
His tears I tried to blink away.
The light turned green and on I drove,
forever silent on a still rainy day.
The rain fell for a fourth day
deluding the rhythm of cars and lights.
Driving from the church
my Camry rolled to a halt.
A Lexus was stopped alone against the curve.
"Just like mine only dressed in luxurious turns."
In it, Idling in the opposite flow,
A lonely lady hid in sheets of acidic rain.
She sat bent low
holding the steering wheel with withered arms.
Her hair shorn like a lamb before slaughter
and her head wrapped in blood red silk.
Her weeping cries bayed into the sobbing windows and
drowning rain.
My lion's heart felt her dread.
A lifeless life bearing
tumors in her womb
carrying her towards those four mourners
in a green field with grey stones.
But in the cage of plastic and glass
the lion held.
His burning brown eyes looking through mine
His tears I tried to blink away.
The light turned green and on I drove,
forever silent on a still rainy day.
Friday, February 17, 2012
We are jaded
Sometimes I have epiphany moments where life suddenly feels utterly vibrant. Every smell and sound becomes mystically relevant and every scene seems new and meaningful. I do not remember what my childhood was like, but in a way when I have these moments I feel I have become a child again. The world breathes mystery into my heart and I look around with curious eyes wondering what this really is. The rustle of a robin in the in low ivy makes me wonder at its story; the movement of my feet and the soft feeling of clover and grass begs me to see something more than just my inner thoughts. Instead of looking inward towards my wants and needs, the voices and styles of the world around me draw me away into a world that is all too real and wonderful.
My favorite word has for a while been the word 'jaded.' I love the odd flowiness of it and its root reference to a beautiful stone. But its meaning is what really gets me, Webster defines it 'as made dull, apathetic, or cynical by experience.' Most of us are jaded. We are thoughtlessly wasteful of the joy and wonder of being selflessly aware of the world and others in the world. Even if we are aware we are only aware of it in reference to what it has to say about us, who we are and how we are viewed. The weariness of our self life has made our eyelids too heavy to see the world we have been given; we were born heirs to a world of wonder and life yet our lives of self have borne us far away from the pleasure of being in this world and a part of its beauty.
Yet again Christ says: "Come to me all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
For the burden we bear is ourselves and the yoke we take up is Christ's cross. How telling is it that Christ's cross is a lighter burden to bear than our own selfishness? Christ tells us elsewhere that to know him we must become like little children again. And in becoming children we cast aside our jaded perspective and renew a right view of the gift we have been given.
My favorite word has for a while been the word 'jaded.' I love the odd flowiness of it and its root reference to a beautiful stone. But its meaning is what really gets me, Webster defines it 'as made dull, apathetic, or cynical by experience.' Most of us are jaded. We are thoughtlessly wasteful of the joy and wonder of being selflessly aware of the world and others in the world. Even if we are aware we are only aware of it in reference to what it has to say about us, who we are and how we are viewed. The weariness of our self life has made our eyelids too heavy to see the world we have been given; we were born heirs to a world of wonder and life yet our lives of self have borne us far away from the pleasure of being in this world and a part of its beauty.
Yet again Christ says: "Come to me all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
For the burden we bear is ourselves and the yoke we take up is Christ's cross. How telling is it that Christ's cross is a lighter burden to bear than our own selfishness? Christ tells us elsewhere that to know him we must become like little children again. And in becoming children we cast aside our jaded perspective and renew a right view of the gift we have been given.
Monday, February 6, 2012
By Hearing with Faith
Gal. 3:2: "Let me ask you only this: Did you recieve the Spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith?"
Our life in Christ does not begin with our action nor does it continue nor depend upon the working and doing of our hands and feets, but rather in the receiving and hearing in faith of the spirit and word of Christ. When we attend church or pick up our Bibles or kneel down in prayer or commune in fellowship with other Christians, it is not an act of obligation but the real gift of life. Any activity in Christ only begins when these things become joys, our bread of life. The consequence of our receiving of these gifts in faith is the fruits of true faith, the bearing forth the fruits of the Spirit of Christ.
The gospel is not meant as a one time rite of passage into the christian faith, but rather the message spoken to our hearts over and over again repeating the everlasting truth of the love and grace of Christ that quite literally breaks our hearts of stone and continually reminds us where to look when we struggle with our rusty, broken lives. Forgetting is our forte, remembering Christ daily is the beginning of our abiding life in Him.
Our life in Christ does not begin with our action nor does it continue nor depend upon the working and doing of our hands and feets, but rather in the receiving and hearing in faith of the spirit and word of Christ. When we attend church or pick up our Bibles or kneel down in prayer or commune in fellowship with other Christians, it is not an act of obligation but the real gift of life. Any activity in Christ only begins when these things become joys, our bread of life. The consequence of our receiving of these gifts in faith is the fruits of true faith, the bearing forth the fruits of the Spirit of Christ.
The gospel is not meant as a one time rite of passage into the christian faith, but rather the message spoken to our hearts over and over again repeating the everlasting truth of the love and grace of Christ that quite literally breaks our hearts of stone and continually reminds us where to look when we struggle with our rusty, broken lives. Forgetting is our forte, remembering Christ daily is the beginning of our abiding life in Him.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Rare Life
Sewn, rooted, flung
Systematically Vibrant
Colorfully collected
Filling and overflowing, consuming and reproducing
Violently unique
All freckled and folded
It grasps, moves full of hope
Urging forward, outward
Then gives forth itself
Begetting again
Life
Life knows its own preciousness.
To Ends and Deeps it reaches out
And the Earth bears forth its abundance.
Sings, soothes, feeds, kills and destroys, and yet again is reborn
Life flows on
Tuning itself to an unknown melody
Bound and boxed in by nothing, eternally creative
Its vibrant voice calls forth:
Echoing hard knowledge even from its darkest forms,
Murmuring truths to captive minds
Life speaks on
Carefully hold it
Guard it and know it,
Use it, create with it
Speak of it and name it,
Open it and see
The Heart of Me
Systematically Vibrant
Colorfully collected
Filling and overflowing, consuming and reproducing
Violently unique
All freckled and folded
It grasps, moves full of hope
Urging forward, outward
Then gives forth itself
Begetting again
Life
Life knows its own preciousness.
To Ends and Deeps it reaches out
And the Earth bears forth its abundance.
Sings, soothes, feeds, kills and destroys, and yet again is reborn
Life flows on
Tuning itself to an unknown melody
Bound and boxed in by nothing, eternally creative
Its vibrant voice calls forth:
Echoing hard knowledge even from its darkest forms,
Murmuring truths to captive minds
Life speaks on
Carefully hold it
Guard it and know it,
Use it, create with it
Speak of it and name it,
Open it and see
The Heart of Me
Monday, December 12, 2011
Since everyone else is commenting on Tebow...
From an article I read that comes from a secular perspective:
"The crux here, the issue driving this whole "Tebow Thing," is the matter of faith. It's the ongoing choice between embracing a warm feeling that makes no sense or a cold pragmatism that's probably true. And with Tebow, that illogical warm feeling keeps working out. It pays off. The upside to secular thinking is that — in theory — your skepticism will prove correct. Your rightness might be emotionally unsatisfying, but it confirms a stable understanding of the universe. Sports fans who love statistics fall into this camp. People who reject cognitive dissonance build this camp and find the firewood. But Tebow wrecks all that, because he makes blind faith a viable option. His faith in God, his followers' faith in him — it all defies modernity. This is why people care so much. He is making people wonder if they should try to believe things they don't actually believe."
http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/7319858/the-people-hate-tim-tebow
Oddly, I think this could be said about what Christ has done for us. What we thought foolishness has now become wise and what was holy, other, different and unknowable has become one in empathy with us. I hate to trivialize Christ by comparing him to a modern popular figure, but I do think there is some value in recognizing parts of who he is through applicable, modern realities. When Christ tells us "take up your cross and follow Me," doing so would have seemed foolish to us before, but by becoming human and going before us, he has made us believe in that thing we actually could not believe in or act on before.
My favorite Christmas hymn has a verse that speaks to this:
Filled with mercy for the broken man
Yes he walked my road, and He felt my pain,
Joys and sorrows that I know so well;
Yet His righteous steps, give me hope again -
I will follow my Immanuel!
From the Squalor of a Borrowed Stable
P.S.
I am one of those hard core stats people, but I think I know that like life, sports mean nothing unless they reach somewhere deeper than simply the logical. Life was never meant to be lived, expressed, and experienced with only an empty pragmatic mind, or God would never have been able to simply say to his disciples, "drop all your stuff and come follow me."
"The crux here, the issue driving this whole "Tebow Thing," is the matter of faith. It's the ongoing choice between embracing a warm feeling that makes no sense or a cold pragmatism that's probably true. And with Tebow, that illogical warm feeling keeps working out. It pays off. The upside to secular thinking is that — in theory — your skepticism will prove correct. Your rightness might be emotionally unsatisfying, but it confirms a stable understanding of the universe. Sports fans who love statistics fall into this camp. People who reject cognitive dissonance build this camp and find the firewood. But Tebow wrecks all that, because he makes blind faith a viable option. His faith in God, his followers' faith in him — it all defies modernity. This is why people care so much. He is making people wonder if they should try to believe things they don't actually believe."
http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/7319858/the-people-hate-tim-tebow
Oddly, I think this could be said about what Christ has done for us. What we thought foolishness has now become wise and what was holy, other, different and unknowable has become one in empathy with us. I hate to trivialize Christ by comparing him to a modern popular figure, but I do think there is some value in recognizing parts of who he is through applicable, modern realities. When Christ tells us "take up your cross and follow Me," doing so would have seemed foolish to us before, but by becoming human and going before us, he has made us believe in that thing we actually could not believe in or act on before.
My favorite Christmas hymn has a verse that speaks to this:
Filled with mercy for the broken man
Yes he walked my road, and He felt my pain,
Joys and sorrows that I know so well;
Yet His righteous steps, give me hope again -
I will follow my Immanuel!
From the Squalor of a Borrowed Stable
P.S.
I am one of those hard core stats people, but I think I know that like life, sports mean nothing unless they reach somewhere deeper than simply the logical. Life was never meant to be lived, expressed, and experienced with only an empty pragmatic mind, or God would never have been able to simply say to his disciples, "drop all your stuff and come follow me."
Thursday, November 3, 2011
aliens and the alien
I used to always enjoy watching the History channel, but recently its been driving me pretty crazy. Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy the occasional episode of swamp people and modern marvels, but the name History implies that it should discuss history.
Instead, the only history that the history channel has been trying to explain to me is how aliens somehow were the cause of virtually everything in the ancient world. They helped the Incans build Machu Pichu, the Egyptians build the Pyramids; they gave them language, religion, art, and morality. Pretty incredible, who knew? Segments like "Ancient Aliens: Aliens and the Secret Code," "Ancient Aliens: Alien Devastation," "Ancient Aliens: Angels and Aliens," pop up as this week's alien flavor. Not surprisingly, there are plenty of eager historians to share there new 'facts' about aliens in the ancient world.
But the History Channel is probably one of our last cultural institutions to grab a hold of these aliens. I couldn't even begin to tell you the number of movies that have been made over the last couple decades with a plot involving alien influence, invasion, struggle or whatever. And if you walk into a Half-Price book store the section of Science Fiction is taking up more and more space.
But why is this? Maybe I could pass off this growing belief in science and history that aliens do exist as actualities of rationality, but I really don't think that's the whole truth, nor really anywhere close to the truth if I'm honest. We live in a culture dominated by materialism, rationalism, naturalism; even in post-modernism, even if science isn't the driving mind to our culture anymore (which I still think it is, just maybe more subtly and deeply than we know), the fundamental belief of most westerners is that the universe contains no other answers but material ones. Our place in it is simply a natural progression of it and we are nothing more than that. Even if I desperately disbelieve those principles, I find many of its tenets and conclusions stuck somewhere in me, ingrained in me by the world I live in.
But even in this world, we still search for meaning, purpose and beginnings, we still are looking for mysteries, we still look for the alien. The movie plot lines of alien invasion and encounter generally follow these basic lines:
1. Aliens are invading us because we are destroying the earth or we are incapable of being peaceful, we are inherently messed up and should be destroyed. Sometimes the heroes save the world and therefore redeem it by giving a new morality of courage to us. Sometimes there's an alien who comes to warn us before we are to be destroyed by other aliens because he sees 'potential' in humanity... he has an unwarranted love and compassion for us.
2. Aliens are coming to tell us something, share or show us some deep moral truth, some overarching principle of the universe. Or maybe they're some kind of moral judge over us, choosing the good and bad ones from among us, separating the wheat from the chaff if you will.
3. Aliens are something new and exciting to blow up or kill or just something mysterious to throw into a story to make it more attractive to the viewers. They are a new adventure if you will.
I think I covered the basics. I haven't read all the science fiction dealing with aliens and I'm sure its more complicated than that, but I would bet many of the same themes are presented. But what are these themes saying about us, from where are they emanating? Are they not essentially the same kinds of themes we deal with when we talk about religion or mythology? Could it be that we have simply replaced super natural mythology with naturalistic, extraterrestrial mythology?
A mythology that supports our need for a basis of morality (really a purpose for life), a hope for a salve to our wounded humanity or a salvation for it, and an alien otherness, a mysterious being to relate with but also be terrified by. All these things are instinctively mystical and outside of our rational way of viewing the world. Its as if we have projected our human mysticism into our deeply ingrained materialism even though it is constantly at war with this desire within us. This ideology was supposed to give us freedom from our irrationalities, yet if i may dare say it clearly hasn't. We are born with something that not even the most anti-mystical ideology can wipe from us. We need to have a purpose to live for and a principle to live by, even if it was given to us by some alien from a world called oz. We feel utterly messed up and out of place all the time. We seek a redemption for us and the world because we constantly feel our hearts both drifting from what is right and in the wrong place to begin with. And maybe most of all, we desperately seek that which is alien, holy, mysterious because we feel alien in this world and because we feel the need to be in awe of something.
The truth is that Christianity has always dealt with these questions and has always answered them.
The otherness of aliens is distinctly what attracts them to us. The description of God as well, his holiness, his absolute otherness is both supremely terrifying but yet awesome and desireable to us. The alien in God is part of the reason we desire him. The implanted desire for His holiness in many has been projected by people into the infinite material universe on some alien life form.
But maybe that's to simple for you. Argue the semantics of whether aliens exist or not all you want, but that's just not the point. Our hearts and minds often get mixed up more than we think. Our worldviews and desires for the world and universe create the history and science of the universe way more than we are willing to say, and the overwhelming feeling of our modern world desires aliens to exist. To me the why we desire them is the important question because it leads us back to the nature of humans and what, if anything, is already written into our hearts and minds at the inception of our consciousness.
Instead, the only history that the history channel has been trying to explain to me is how aliens somehow were the cause of virtually everything in the ancient world. They helped the Incans build Machu Pichu, the Egyptians build the Pyramids; they gave them language, religion, art, and morality. Pretty incredible, who knew? Segments like "Ancient Aliens: Aliens and the Secret Code," "Ancient Aliens: Alien Devastation," "Ancient Aliens: Angels and Aliens," pop up as this week's alien flavor. Not surprisingly, there are plenty of eager historians to share there new 'facts' about aliens in the ancient world.
But the History Channel is probably one of our last cultural institutions to grab a hold of these aliens. I couldn't even begin to tell you the number of movies that have been made over the last couple decades with a plot involving alien influence, invasion, struggle or whatever. And if you walk into a Half-Price book store the section of Science Fiction is taking up more and more space.
But why is this? Maybe I could pass off this growing belief in science and history that aliens do exist as actualities of rationality, but I really don't think that's the whole truth, nor really anywhere close to the truth if I'm honest. We live in a culture dominated by materialism, rationalism, naturalism; even in post-modernism, even if science isn't the driving mind to our culture anymore (which I still think it is, just maybe more subtly and deeply than we know), the fundamental belief of most westerners is that the universe contains no other answers but material ones. Our place in it is simply a natural progression of it and we are nothing more than that. Even if I desperately disbelieve those principles, I find many of its tenets and conclusions stuck somewhere in me, ingrained in me by the world I live in.
But even in this world, we still search for meaning, purpose and beginnings, we still are looking for mysteries, we still look for the alien. The movie plot lines of alien invasion and encounter generally follow these basic lines:
1. Aliens are invading us because we are destroying the earth or we are incapable of being peaceful, we are inherently messed up and should be destroyed. Sometimes the heroes save the world and therefore redeem it by giving a new morality of courage to us. Sometimes there's an alien who comes to warn us before we are to be destroyed by other aliens because he sees 'potential' in humanity... he has an unwarranted love and compassion for us.
2. Aliens are coming to tell us something, share or show us some deep moral truth, some overarching principle of the universe. Or maybe they're some kind of moral judge over us, choosing the good and bad ones from among us, separating the wheat from the chaff if you will.
3. Aliens are something new and exciting to blow up or kill or just something mysterious to throw into a story to make it more attractive to the viewers. They are a new adventure if you will.
I think I covered the basics. I haven't read all the science fiction dealing with aliens and I'm sure its more complicated than that, but I would bet many of the same themes are presented. But what are these themes saying about us, from where are they emanating? Are they not essentially the same kinds of themes we deal with when we talk about religion or mythology? Could it be that we have simply replaced super natural mythology with naturalistic, extraterrestrial mythology?
A mythology that supports our need for a basis of morality (really a purpose for life), a hope for a salve to our wounded humanity or a salvation for it, and an alien otherness, a mysterious being to relate with but also be terrified by. All these things are instinctively mystical and outside of our rational way of viewing the world. Its as if we have projected our human mysticism into our deeply ingrained materialism even though it is constantly at war with this desire within us. This ideology was supposed to give us freedom from our irrationalities, yet if i may dare say it clearly hasn't. We are born with something that not even the most anti-mystical ideology can wipe from us. We need to have a purpose to live for and a principle to live by, even if it was given to us by some alien from a world called oz. We feel utterly messed up and out of place all the time. We seek a redemption for us and the world because we constantly feel our hearts both drifting from what is right and in the wrong place to begin with. And maybe most of all, we desperately seek that which is alien, holy, mysterious because we feel alien in this world and because we feel the need to be in awe of something.
The truth is that Christianity has always dealt with these questions and has always answered them.
The otherness of aliens is distinctly what attracts them to us. The description of God as well, his holiness, his absolute otherness is both supremely terrifying but yet awesome and desireable to us. The alien in God is part of the reason we desire him. The implanted desire for His holiness in many has been projected by people into the infinite material universe on some alien life form.
But maybe that's to simple for you. Argue the semantics of whether aliens exist or not all you want, but that's just not the point. Our hearts and minds often get mixed up more than we think. Our worldviews and desires for the world and universe create the history and science of the universe way more than we are willing to say, and the overwhelming feeling of our modern world desires aliens to exist. To me the why we desire them is the important question because it leads us back to the nature of humans and what, if anything, is already written into our hearts and minds at the inception of our consciousness.
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